Common Questions Survivors of Narcissistic Abuse Often Ask

#1 “Why didn’t I see it sooner?”
Narcissistic abuse is often subtle and develops gradually. Manipulation, gaslighting, and intermittent kindness can make it difficult to recognise what is happening in the moment. Not seeing it earlier is not a failure — it is a common response to sustained emotional manipulation.

#2 “Why do I still miss them, even though the relationship was harmful?”
Many survivors experience trauma bonding, where emotional attachment forms through cycles of affection and distress. Missing the person does not mean the abuse was acceptable; it reflects the nervous system’s response to prolonged relational stress.

#3 “Was it really abuse if there was no physical harm?”
Yes. Emotional and psychological abuse can have profound and lasting effects on mental health, self-esteem, and emotional safety. Abuse is defined by patterns of control and harm, not by the presence of physical injury.

#4 “Why do I feel guilty or responsible?”
Guilt is a common outcome of manipulation and gaslighting. Over time, responsibility is shifted onto the survivor, making it difficult to trust one’s own perceptions. These feelings are learned responses, not reflections of truth.

#5 “How do I trust myself again?”
Rebuilding self-trust takes time and support. Healing involves recognising patterns, restoring boundaries, and reconnecting with your internal sense of safety and intuition. With trauma-informed support, confidence and clarity can return.

#6 Why do I feel confused about what happened?
Ongoing manipulation and gaslighting can disrupt clarity and self-trust. Confusion is a common and expected response.

#7 Why do I blame myself?
Self-blame often develops through repeated minimisation, criticism, and responsibility-shifting by the other person.

#8 How has this affected my mental health?
Survivors may experience anxiety, low self-esteem, hypervigilance, emotional exhaustion, or symptoms of trauma.

#9 Can I recover from narcissistic abuse?
Yes. With awareness, support, and trauma-informed counselling, healing, clarity, and self-trust can be rebuilt.

How can counselling help?
Counselling provides a safe space to understand patterns, process emotional impact, restore boundaries, and support recovery.

If you recognise these experiences in your own life, you don’t have to navigate them alone. Counselling offers a safe, compassionate space to process what you’ve been through, rebuild boundaries, and restore self-trust.